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A podcast for busy midlifers ready to reclaim their energy, joy, and purpose.
Are you, like me, riding the rollercoaster of midlife and menopause, and eager to get back to living your best life? Are you tired of low energy, a short temper and endless self doubt?
Well, It’s time to stress less and shine more. It’s time ditch the worry, reclaim your mojo and unleash your inner brilliance.
It's never too late to transform, and you’re certainly not too old. And in my opinion, midlife and menopause provide the perfect opportunity to do just that.
Join me each week for uplifting stories and expert insights on how to feel as good as you can and create a joyful, purpose-driven life you truly love.
So when you’re ready, Let the beautiful menomorphosis begin!
MENOMORPHOSIS
Thursday Thoughts - The Power of Pets
On this week’s Thursday Thoughts, Lucy and I are talking about pets.
We share how our own pets bring us so much joy and explore why animals can be such healing additions to our lives.
We chats about how pets can help regulate our nervous systems, bring us back to the present moment, and lift our mood on the days we need it most.
We hope you enjoy this conversation.
Love Polly & Lucy xx
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Hello and welcome to Thursday Thoughts. Thursday Thoughts what on earth are they? I hear you ask. Well, my friend Lucy and I meet every week over on Instagram to talk all things personal growth, because she is as obsessed with it as I am, and we decided that we might as well put those conversations out as a weekly podcast. So now you can listen to us chat here on Apple Podcast or spotify or wherever you listen to your podcasts, and we'll be talking about topics such as spirituality, limiting beliefs, the ego imposter syndrome, gratitude, meditation, confidence and so much more. So, if you're ready, here we go right this morning.
Speaker 1:Tuesday motivation, becauseation, because we weren't here yesterday because it was bank holiday we're going to be talking all about pets. So we both have a pet. I have Herbie the dog, you've got Johnny, your cat, and I kind of thought this would be a really nice topic, actually, because pets, I think, can be so healing. Pets, I think, can be so healing. They can be such a brilliant addition to any household, whether you're on your own, whether you're with family, whatever. And I thought it'd be quite fun to dive into this a little bit more, because there's actually loads of research about, yeah, the benefits of pets and you know, the most interesting one is how it can. They can really really reduce our stress levels, um, the actual cortisol in our body, even by looking at a pet, let alone stroking a pet. So there is so much, I think, which we can take from a pet. So maybe I'll just tell you a little bit.
Speaker 1:Maybe should I just start by telling you a bit about my journey. So I did grow up with dogs, I grew up with cats and then I didn't have a pet for a very long time and then in I think it was well, herbie just turned seven last Friday, on Good Friday. Uh, so we had him. We got him in 2018 and it was all actually slightly by accident that we got Herbie. We had looked after a friend's dog. Uh, we for about three weeks and we it was the second time we'd looked after their dog and we absolutely loved looking after their dog but we were always a bit I was it was me actually going no, I've got three small children, I've got a job, it's just not gonna work having a dog. And I it was everybody else in the family was like we want to have a dog, we want to have a dog. I was like, no, we're not having it. Anyway, we looked after Sparkle, our friend's dog, and when Sparkle went and Sparkle went, we loved having Sparkle.
Speaker 1:When Sparkle went, we were all a bit bereft, particularly me, and I remember I was walking back from the school run with a friend one morning and, um, I was saying to her I feel like I'm, you know, really bereft, I'm really missing sparkle, and literally it was in. She then sent me a message that day, said oh, I've just heard this friend of a friend's puppy dog is having six puppies and they're exactly the type of dog you want. They were just dogs like sparkle. Um, here's her number. So obviously I phoned. I was like if I didn't want a dog I probably shouldn't have touched the number. Anyway, I phoned the number and she said oh, they're being born. Whenever it was, come and come and have a look.
Speaker 1:So I took the children, we went and had a look and of course you can't go and look at little puppies and not get one. So we ended up all by accident, and we ended up getting, um, a puppy, and that was Herbie. And do you know what is the best thing? Okay, that first year was completely chaotic, with all the puppy training and all of that. It was completely nuts. However, it's been the best thing for our family, because he is the one thing that when anyone's pissed off or having a bad day or angry with anybody or he, he's where everyone goes, it's like. He's like a real center, focal point of the family, who gets all the love, who gives it back, who's always happy to see you and it's be. Yeah, he is such a part of the family now we couldn't imagine. I mean, oh gosh, we can't really imagine life without him. Um, so, yes, that's, that's our little.
Speaker 2:You know our journey with Herbie when we got him that's, that's the, that's the downsides of having a pet, isn't it? Because they don't have a very, very long lifespan, and the thought I mean yeah, I mean the thought of, I'm sure, losing herby makes you feel completely bereft. And it's the same with with me and Johnny, and to give some of my sort of backstory. So I also grew up with pets. We had a dog, we had a black labrador. We had, and in fact I had a cat, and I say I because the dogador we had and in fact I had a cat. And I say I because the dog was my sister's officially and the cat, ebby, ebony, ebby for short was mine. I don't quite know how that worked out, but so I was. I always kind of considered myself a cat person rather than dog person, much as I loved our dog Jumbo was her name, and but so yeah, so yeah, I was very, very used to growing up with pets we had. You know, we had rabbits, we have freaking guinea pigs, gerbils, cat, dog and then.
Speaker 2:But then I didn't, like you, I didn't have an, a pet for, like, basically most of my adult life I didn't have a pet. So when I left home, went to university and, you know, got my own flat and blah, blah, blah hadn't have a pet. So when I left home, went to university and, you know, got my own flat and blah, blah, blah, blah Hadn't had a pet. In fact, because my, my flat in London is so tiny, I was. I was never thinking about getting a cat.
Speaker 2:And then a neighbor, slash friend of mine, who lives in the same building as me, said a friend of mine has a cat, is having kittens. Said a friend of mine has a cat, is having kittens. You know what do you think? And she was actually talking about doing like a cat share. And I was like there's. I said. I was basically like no, if I, if and when I get a cat, it will be my cat. I'm not interested in sharing a cat with anyone if I get one, and also my flat is way too small for a cat, so no. And then anyway, um, what? Very, very sadly, that particular Lissa, I think all but one of those kittens died. So she didn't get a cat either at that point. Anyway, a couple of years later, this cat gets pregnant again and, my friends, like you know, the cat's pregnant again. What do you?
Speaker 2:think and I don't know what it was, but I think actually I do know what it was, it's just reminded me. So my sister got a cat, probably about I don't know six, five or six years ago, and because I spent a lot of time there, like I kind of seeing Biscuit regularly, her cat, my sister's cat kind of, was reminding me how much I love cats. So I kind of had it in my head of like, oh god. So when my neighbor reached out to me again for the second time about getting a cat, I just said, yeah, fuck it, why not? I'll do it.
Speaker 2:And and it was so funny because I got Johnny when he was 12 weeks he's actually turned three on the 7th of May and when I the funny thing was that when I first got him, this tiny, tiny little kitten, 12 weeks old, I had such major pet regret for that because I didn't yeah, I did, I really did. I was like what the fuck have I done to my life? Like what have I done? And it's, you know, because I think it takes. I think it takes a while, even if, you know, obviously he was completely divine and gorgeous when he was a kitten. Like he was completely divine, but I think it takes a little bit of time to bond with a pet. Maybe it's the same with babies, I don't know, but certainly with pet, certainly with pet. Well, for me anyway, and it took me a few weeks, and I remember, probably about three or four weeks down the line, being in floods of tears with my sister going. I don't know what I've done. Oh, my god, I've got this cat. There's just like this creature living in my flat and it's like, like you know, because I, I'd lived on my own at that point for years and suddenly there was this little live creature in my flat that was just like there and like staring at me and I was meant to like look after it and it was just. I really felt quite overwhelmed but inevitably, you know, within a couple of months I was completely obsessed and my obsession continues to grow every single day. I literally adore this cat more than I ever, ever thought I would Like, I, he and this is the thing about pets he, they just bring so much joy and I swear I, I, I feel so much joy every single day because of Johnny, like, I just have to look at this cat and it kind of never wears off. Do you know what I mean? Like it never, it never goes, it never gets less. Like I never kind of get used to how completely divine he is, it's just it never gets old. So it's just the most, you know. It's the most incredible thing.
Speaker 2:And actually, obviously you have a family, you've got a husband and three kids and I'm single, and I think, particularly for any single women out there listening, if you're thinking about getting a pet, just freaking, do it, because even though with Johnny, obviously he, you know, I now I'm not so footloose and fancy free as I was, because I have to think about, you know, if I'm going to be away for a night, who's going to look after him? I mean, most of the time I take him everywhere with me, as you know, but when I can't, um, obviously you have to think about about that and it's a response. It's a big responsibility having a pet. Much as I I'm very glad to have that responsibility, I do sometimes think, christ, you know, long gone are the days where I could literally just drop everything and bugger off to wherever or go and see whoever without even having to think about it. But I think when you're, when you're single, particularly not saying you need a pet, but for me, johnny has just enhanced my life, so so, so, so much. And you and I talk a lot about.
Speaker 2:You know keeping your vibrational frequency high and you know how the importance of feeling good as much as we can, because we know that what we put out, the energy that we put out, is the energy that we're going to get back, and there is just nothing like a pet to maintain that sort of high vibe frequency. At least that's what I find with Johnny. Like I, if I'm feeling down or if I, um, or even if I'm not just spending a few minutes just hanging out with him, just like burying my face in his gorgeous little spotty tummy, it's just like, ah, it's just too much. It's too much like, honestly, my heart, I swear to god, my heart can't take it, like I can't take the cuteness.
Speaker 2:In fact, this morning, um, I, when I, when I got up this morning and I fed him, so this was, like you know, quarter past five this morning and I fed him, so this was, like you know, quarter past five this morning, and quite often what he'll do is he'll be in and out throughout the night, um, and quite often when he's had his breakfast in the morning. He'll then kind of curl up and sleep for several hours, and this morning normally he sleeps like either on the bed or on the sofa or, you know, on a chair. But this morning he he went under my duvet and he's literally curled up like essentially in my bed, with just his head poking out and the rest of him under the duvet, and it's just like it's too, it's too much, it's you? Just the joy that they bring is just it's too much, isn't?
Speaker 1:it. I know that's so funny. I mean Herbie just makes us laugh because he's so funny. He's just, you know he's, I mean he. I mean he sleeps a lot. He's very cute. You know, he's such a joy to have on the sofa in the evening having a snuggle. He's three quarters lab, so he will eat anything, anything and can be really disgusting sometimes and but you have to take it. You kind of always forgive him. You know, yesterday he, he vomited and then of course he gobbles it all back up again because it's another meal and it's things like that.
Speaker 1:It's like, oh no, and then he wants to lick your face.
Speaker 1:It's like no, no, no, no, I'm not that is not happening, but he's um, but he's just so funny, he is just, he just makes, he just makes you laugh. He's funny, you know, and he's not, but equally annoying. You know, whenever I want to stretch or do anything on a mat, he'll just plonk himself on it or on me or you know, and just, but it's just having that extra companion throughout the day and he's, you know, he's always here in his like he's tipping now, but yeah, he does. He brings us so much joy and I just love it, as you know and I think, particularly as I've had three teenagers, three kids growing up and like, particularly when, you know things are, relationships are difficult between them, maybe between us parents and them, and I honestly have found that having Herbie has been just so amazing because he literally is like a therapy dog.
Speaker 1:If anyone's feeling a little bit low or feeling like I need a little bit of love, he's always there for a cuddle and he will always, you know, they'll literally go and curl up in his, in his basket with him, and that's what I absolutely love about him, because he's it's that kind of that constant love, a pouring of love, that he gives out, no matter what.
Speaker 1:That is just, you know you don't really get from anybody else. You know constantly he's always happy to see you, um, how you know. So I it's, it really is no, I, if I was on my own, I would absolutely 100% have a pet, I think, just for the companionship, just to have that um, hasn't that that, that that creature there, but also just to get you out. And I know cats are slightly obviously a different, depends what sort of pet you've got. But for me that is one reason I absolutely love having a dog, because and particularly a dog who does need to go out twice a day, yeah, and it just is brilliant to, you know, get you moving and eat whatever the weather, you've got to get out, and I think for many people it's a really good excuse, it's a really good accountability partner.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I've got to get out, I've got to go for a walk, and it takes, and it takes you to go and explore different places, uh, to go to really lovely countryside, and so the health benefits in that sense are just, yeah, absolutely brilliant. So, yeah, we, we wouldn't be without him. He does drive me nuts sometimes, but, yeah, I wouldn't be without him. What I was gonna say is also um, it just teaches you that responsibility to for care. You know good, caring for something else and I'm again, I'm just thinking of my kids. It kind of gives, teaches them that responsibility they've got to look after, they've got he's to be fed. It's looking after someone, not just yourself, which I think is a really positive thing.
Speaker 1:When I was teaching in schools my last school we had actually two of the schools I've taught in had reading dogs. So these amazing dogs who had been trained to come into the school where children would read to the dog and the dog would just listen, because it had been found that they were much more willing, like a reluctant reader, would be much more willing to read to a dog Really, because the dog would. Yeah, and also just the whole bonding with the dog, yeah, it's amazing. So that you know they really are so powerful, yeah, I mean they, they, they truly are.
Speaker 2:I mean, basically, pets make your life better. They, they just make your life better. And you know, use the word therapy, like herbie being a therapy job on that dog, and I feel exactly the same way about johnny. He is like daily therapy. And you know, like you mentioned at the beginning, there is so much research to show the benefits of having an animal and for people with mental health issues, having a pet is a freaking game changer. It is it. You know, they lift your mood. The end, they, they just do.
Speaker 2:And you know, I think, especially for people who are struggling with mental health issues, I think they, they can be a real game changer, pets. And even for someone like you know, I didn't necessarily need a cat. I didn't get, I didn't get Johnny because I felt like I needed another being in my flat. So I was very happy, happily living my life as a, you know, single woman living alone. But I think, whatever, wherever you are in your life, a pet is going to enhance it and make it better and they truly are like. They truly are like therapy. Um, and and one thing actually in in my book, I've I in my acknowledgements at the end I do an acknowledgement to Johnny, which sounds I literally do, I do an acknowledgement.
Speaker 2:I say I know, I know I mean, and it sounds ridiculous, but I just say something, like you know, to Johnny for being the only, because Johnny is the only creature, the only living being, who has been there every step of the way through writing that book, the only person, not, he's not a person. I've got to stop saying that he feels I sometimes feel like he's actually my child, but he's the only being that has been there through that whole process. And that's the thing about pets. They are this constant and they are, you know, like you were saying. You know, with all the other relationships in your life. There's all you know. There's. You might be having a struggle with that person or an issue with that person. Whatever pets are, you know what you're freaking getting. Always they are the same all the time and human beings are not. And that's what's so wonderful about pets is that you know exactly what you're going to get because they're just always the same. And also, one of the most amazing things about pets is that they are if you watch any animal, they are just living in the present moment. Any animal, they are just living in the present moment, like they are just the most brilliant, brilliant example of how to live in the present moment, and you know I look at Johnny and bless him this.
Speaker 2:So for the last last, I mean okay, this is perhaps a slight exception for a cat, but as you know, I take him everywhere with me and I've been up in London for the last week I was staying, so when I was um, I was recording my audio book London. For the last week I was staying so when I was, I was recording my audio book last week, and the days that I was recording it he stayed with the neighbor that I was talking about, who is the reason I got him in the first place. So during the day. So we went from where I'm in Dorset up to London, not to mention by the way that this cat I take him around in a car, long, long car journeys. Not to mention by the way that this cat, I take him around in the car, long car journeys not a peep, he is so good, but dropped him off at Louise's every day when I was recording the audiobook, picked him up. We were then staying at a friend of mine's, claire another different house. We were then spending time at my sister's another different house, and now we're back in Dorset, I swear to God.
Speaker 2:And going back to the whole being in the present moment, wherever he is, and bless him. He's used to being in different, lots of different places, but wherever he is, he's just in the moment, doing his thing. He just adapts and you know where? It doesn't matter where he is, he's still doing. He's still in that kind of same routine of like playing, sleeping, uh, grooming, staring into space or whatever. You know, he's just, whatever happens, he's, he always comes back to the present moment and and actually we can really learn so much from our pets yeah, they're really, really they really are?
Speaker 1:yeah, they are. They are the masters of mindfulness, aren't they? They just absolutely can shake off stuff, so that. So herbie, for example, hates going in the back of the car. He always has done since he was a tiny puppy. It was always a real job to get him in the back of the car. We've tried lots of things. Actually, the thing which is, we've got him this special little um bed, which is, which apparently is for nervous dogs, and it's really awesome. It's really helped him chill out. But the moment he jumps out of the car, he does, he you can tell that he's been a little bit stressed and he just gives himself a shake and it's like literally that sort of shaking off the stress which any animal does after it's kind of experienced that sort of nervous system um stimulation, yeah, shakes it off and then he's fine.
Speaker 1:And if, if us humans could do that more often is shake off our stress and then just return back to a kind of a really lovely regulated balance state, gosh, we'd all be much healthier, much happier. And that's what I love about animals. They just kind of they can do that and then they're in the moment and then they can chill out and, yeah, the most important thing is what is happening right now. They don't. They don't hold on to stress or well, you know, I mean, I know that they can experience trauma of some point. You know, like we can experience trauma, but day to day, genuinely, if they are happy and they're well looked after, yeah, they they're, they're just in the moment and it is they are. They can really teach us something about that. They just want, you know, happy. Just as long as he's got food and he's been asleep and go out for a walk, he's happy. That's good, you know, it's just simply, it's just enjoying those sinful pleasures in life. A nice stick, he's, he's all happy. So I really, yeah, I love that as well. It's so good, um, so, yeah, I'm just trying to think.
Speaker 1:The other thing I was thinking about which popped into my mind is have you seen? Um? There's I can't remember the name of it, but there's this an amazing instagram um account with lady has horses. She has horses for therapy. She's like a therapist, she's like a body worker, an energy worker, and she has horses who because I know that horses are amazing.
Speaker 1:You know lots of people use horses to for healing and for therapy, but watching how these horses come and work with people and literally just lay their heads on a part of the body which is needing some sort of attention in such a gentle way is just amazing. And it's it's just. You just forget, you know these creatures all are. So, yeah, they are beings, they are, and they can be so gentle and so kind of in tune with us and kind of can pick up on what is going on with us and what we need, you know, and that that's I always just think, is unbelievable Totally, and also that you know you just reminded me of something else I wanted to say, which is, you know, it really irritates me when people I mean, don't even get me started on the mistreatment of animals like in another life.
Speaker 2:I'd like to work in that area and in fact, I interviewed somebody for the podcast the other day. Well, we did like a collaboration podcast for somebody in Dubai and she was she's also um, she has a dog, and we were talking about pets and she was talking about how, you know, the treatment of animals over there is just, you know, it's just, it's it's too much, it's just, it's just so awful and it really it. It gets to me so badly, and I'm sure millions of other people it does too, because you know, they're not just animals. Actually, humans are no more important than animals. Like the end we. We are not we. We are just no more important than animals. We're just not. Animals are just as important to the world as we are.
Speaker 2:You know, we're all part of nature and I hate it when people are like oh, for example, with with Johnny, you know, because I like to take him places with me, because I personally I don't like leaving him at home for eight hours. I just don't, you know. I know he'll be quote fine, of course he'll be fine because he'll have to be. But animals, you know, I think we sometimes forget how incredibly sensitive they are too and they have emotions too, like I can tell. With him, if you know, I can tell all the sort of different moods and emotions and how, like you were just saying, how sensitive he is to me and the mood that I'm in you can tell. You know, that's one thing that's so incredible about animals and also I think that the connection that we can have with our pets is amazing. And also I think that you know amazing. And also I think that you know, when people lose pets, there's and actually I think cats really pull the short straw with this if somebody loses a dog, it's seen as quite a big deal, but somebody loses a cat, it's not seen as that big of a deal. It's kind of like oh god, come on, it's just your cat.
Speaker 2:And what I was going to say about Johnny is that I know that some people have been a bit, for example, when I sometimes take him to my sisters and my nephews would be like, oh my God, you know you brought Johnny or whatever. I'm like yes, I brought him and you know, and your point is because they, you know, they are, you know they, they are. I don't, I don't know, I can't remember what, exactly what my point is, but I think it's just that the connection that we can have with them is really really, really special. Like, even though Johnny is a cat, I feel like, I feel close to him. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, and I and I am.
Speaker 2:It's amazing how you, you get to understand all of their different kind of the different little things that they do. You become so in tune with them. Like Johnny, he's a Bengal. Bengals are very talkative. Johnny is very, very talkative. Like he has so many different kinds of sounds that he makes. Like he has squeaks which like just literally, just I can't even take it because they're so cute, but he has all of these. He has lots of different kinds of meows, he has a, he has a yowl sound, he has squeaks and all of these different noises and it's just amazing how, how connected you can feel to your pet.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah you know, you totally understand them and we yeah, I mean I, we totally understand what Herbie needs or what he wants and honestly, he understands so much. I mean I think he understands most things. He understands what we're saying, he understands words and I really genuinely believe that he totally will get what we're saying. You know, he just does. And sometimes this and this is a way this always really surprises me, and I do this sometimes and I've heard this on god, I heard this on some something that they almost can if you're in tune with your dog, your, your pet, sometimes you just need to think about taking him. I just have to think about, right, we're going to go for a walk in a minute. And suddenly he's. Suddenly he's there looking at me, going, okay, let's go then. And it's like, did you really just get what I was thinking? And I honestly can't believe he's got what I'm thinking. I'm like, right, we're going to go now yeah, because he's, yeah, he's so funny no, I do.
Speaker 2:You know, I, I totally know what you mean. I have a similar, like a similar example with Johnny is that I I try to have like play time, official kind of play time with him every day, because he's very, very, he's a very high maintenance cat and, like every day, I like to properly interact with him and, you know, run around and play with him and it's, it's absolutely hilarious because I can and this is how sort of in tune we can be with pets like I can literally give him a look.
Speaker 2:In the same way that you give a human a look, I can give Johnny a look and he knows, he knows that it's playtime and he will like, literally, just by, just by giving him a certain look, he will jump up and he'll leg it across the room because he knows what, what that look means. It's just, it's just the sweetest thing. And in the same way, I can literally say the words do you want to correct, do you want to come and have some food bubs? And he's, like you know, trots along because he, because he, they, they know yeah, they're so much more intelligent, I think, than we, than we give them credit.
Speaker 1:Yeah, absolutely animals are better than humans. They're way better than humans. They don't talk back, do they? That's the thing they do, you know, especially when I've had three teenagers in the house, you know it's great he doesn't talk back. Herbie's like yes, I'll do whatever you say generally, generally, which is always good they are a joy.
Speaker 2:They're a total, total joy. I mean I've got I've actually got goosebumps on my arms even having this conversation, because they just, they truly are. For anyone out there kind of wondering, oh, should I or should I not get a pet, I would say absolutely, absolutely, do it like they just bring so much joy to your life.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I mean it's a commit, it is a commitment and I think for us we were really lucky because we knew, I knew that I had people I knew who could look after him when we couldn't.
Speaker 1:I've got the most amazing dog walker who he goes to once a week and she'll have him, you know, if we go away for a night or whatever. So having people in place to give you that sense of freedom, so we don't, you know, we will take him with us if we can, but it's not always possible that's really, really helpful. So I don't, you don't feel, I don't feel tied ever um, but you know you have to listen and we would never leave him probably for longer than two or three hours in the house on his own, but uh. So, yes, I think it's important if you, if you really are considering getting a pet, but just, yeah, making sure that you find some there's so many people out there who can help and actually there's some that you can actually do exchanges. Now there's um for people to walk your dog or whatever, but yeah, it's totally worth it, totally worth it, absolutely well, it's half past.
Speaker 1:Yeah, well, there we go.
Speaker 2:We took our pets for half an hour I could carry on talking about johnny for three hours without any problem at all oh well, thank you all right.
Speaker 1:Um, yeah, we'll be back. Yeah, see you next week. All right, take care. Lots of love, have a good day, bye, bye.