MENOMORPHOSIS
MENOMORPHOSIS is the go-to podcast for midlife women who are ready to stop feeling like a stranger in their own body — and start feeling calm, energised, and back in charge.
If you're navigating peri/menopause or the messy middle of midlife, you’ll find grounded support, science-backed tools, and compassionate conversations to help you feel more like yourself again — only wiser.
Hosted by Breath & Wellness Coach Polly Warren, each episode blends real-life insight with nervous system know-how to help you navigate hormones, emotions, energy, and identity with more ease — and a lot less pressure.
So take a deep breath. And when you’re ready…
Let the beautiful Menomorphosis begin.
MENOMORPHOSIS
Thursday Thoughts - Writing a Book
This week on Thursday Thoughts, Lucy and I dive into a juicy conversation all about her brand new book Shiny Happy Singles — or Thrive Solo if you're tuning in from the US.
We chat about the inspiration behind the book, what it really means to thrive on your own, and why this message is so needed.
We also pull back the curtain on the creative process: the messy magic of writing, showing up consistently (even when it's hard), and trusting that clarity comes after you begin — not before. No waiting for the perfect moment or a lightning bolt of inspiration… just honest, step-by-step progress.
If you’ve got a book inside you, a creative project on your heart, or a voice that’s been whispering “start”… this one’s for you.
With love,
Polly & Lucy xx
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Hello and welcome to Thursday Thoughts. Thursday Thoughts what on earth are they? I hear you ask. Well, my friend Lucy and I meet every week over on Instagram to talk all things personal growth, because she is as obsessed with it as I am, and we decided that we might as well put those conversations out as a weekly podcast. So now you can listen to us chat here on Apple Podcasts or Spotify or wherever you listen to your podcasts, and we'll be talking about topics such as spirituality, limiting beliefs, the ego imposter syndrome, gratitude, meditation, confidence and so much more. So if you're ready, here we go. So this morning we're going to talk about your new book, lucy which is just so amazing.
Speaker 1:I'm just so in awe of anybody who writes a book and I know the how, I know, I know behind the scenes of what has gone into writing this book and I just think it's just such an amazing example to anybody of just having a little, having a little sprinkle of a dream.
Speaker 1:Sprinkle, that's what having a little having something which you really want to do and then actually going through a process of not really knowing the how and ending up with a book which is out now. So, lucy, first of all tell us what is your book? And then just I'd love to know firstly, you know what you know. Tell everybody. Why did you actually want to write this book, what, what is this book about and why do you want to write it?
Speaker 2:well, by the way, thanks for suggesting this because, um, I really, I really appreciate being able to talk about it that you know, a few days after it's come out. So so the out. So, basically, the book is called Shiny Happy Singles in the UK and it came out last Thursday, on the 19th, and tomorrow the US version comes out, which is called Thrive Solo. But it's exactly for anyone listening on different sides of the pond, it's exactly the same book but just with two different titles. And the irony is that I never aspired to write a book, ever, like it wasn't. I would always have wanted to write an album, because music has always been my thing. So if I had any aspirations, it was I wanted to be a freaking rock star and I wanted to write an album. That hasn't happened, but hey. So the reason it came about it was very strange. It was because I never I mean, you know this, polly, but I never had any intention to write or talk about being single and not having kids ever. It just had never even occurred to me. And then rewind to an apology to any of my listeners to the podcast. You know the story. They've heard it five thousand times. My listeners to the podcast. You know the story, they've heard it 5 000 times.
Speaker 2:But rewind to the summer of 2021, where a lot, of, a lot of change to my life and, to cut a very long story short, I it was. This beautiful afternoon. I was sat outside my flat, uh, flicking through my phone, reading through some whatsapp messages with some friends of mine and you know they're all married with kids and it was like I think we were in another lockdown at the time and you know they were talking about sort of homeschooling and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And basically I just had this thought of like, oh my god, I'm I'm so grateful that I'm single and I don't have kids. And it was almost like I always call it sort of a divine download from the universe that this idea, it just popped into my head, or this sort of urge to talk about this and write about this, because what I thought in that moment was hang on a minute, why? Because because I mean I've been saying at that point for several years, but it wasn't something that I thought about. I was just living my life.
Speaker 2:It wasn't as if I was sitting around thinking about being single, not having kids. It was just like I was just living my goddamn life perfectly happily, but I suddenly thought fuck, why, why does the world think that my life, ie a life without a husband and kids, is less than, or that I haven't made it, or that I failed in some way? And, and more than that, why do they think that I'm lonely, miserable, desperate, blah, blah, blah, blah. Because that is, let's be honest, that is the narrative around being single and not having kids, and it's so ingrained. And so I just, I just felt this overwhelming urge to write about it.
Speaker 2:And what actually happened was that I literally got up from my flat as I say, never in my life had I ever thought about writing a book ever but I got up from this bench outside, I walked back in, I sat down at my desk and I started typing on my laptop. Walks back in, I sat down at my desk and I started typing on my laptop, but, ironically, what I typed for the next three months, which was about I think it was nearly about 30 or 40,000 words. I wrote a lot. That is not the book that has just come out into the world, because what happened was that was kind of like just my thoughts just flowing out onto my laptop. You know, just all of these thoughts and feelings and my experience just kind of coming out of me like some, like sort of catharsis. But anyway, to cut, to cut long story short. I've already said that, haven't I?
Speaker 1:yeah, can I just ask, though when you were doing that, when you were just like, yeah, going out, like writing out all that, yeah, did you put it into chapters or anything, or did you just literally just write?
Speaker 2:no, I, I did put it into vague chapters, but it was a load of shit. It was basically. I mean, it really was, it was, it was crap, there was no, there was no structure to it there, it was just like thoughts on a page, but, yes, vaguely, vaguely, turned into chapters. But what actually happened was that a few months later, I then decided to start the podcast and the book got completely sidelined, or what I'd written at that point got completely sidelined, because the podcast then took over my life and like, literally, it was like became my full time job. And and then, a few months after I'd started the podcast where I hadn't even thought about the book for ages, even though I'd actually I'd actually hired an editor because my plan was to self-publish it. So at that point I'd even like paid money for an editor to start going through it anyway started the podcast and a few months after that I started in February 22, and then in August, um, I got an email out of the blue from Bloomsbury and I nearly fell off my fucking chair because I was like, in fact, what I did and it said you know, would you be interested in writing a book? You know, I've been listening to your podcast, blah, blah, blah. And I was so gobsmacked that I thought it was fake and I was like, well, this, well, clearly this isn't real, cause, like that was absolutely no way. And I sort of checked the email address and anyway, of course, I got back to. Her name is Holly, who is my editor and is amazing, by the way, holly Gerald from Bloomsbury. I love her, she's just been incredible. But even then that was so. That was August 2022.
Speaker 2:It wasn't until almost a year later that I actually signed a book deal with Bloomsbury. Because you have to come up with a proposal. I, I got an agent and then I mean, my book proposal alone was I think it was it was more than 40 pages like a book proposal is a freaking mission in itself. So I got my, got my agent, kate, who helped me sort of shape the book proposal, because even when Bloomsbury reach out to you saying, are you interested in writing a book, there is no guarantee that you're going to get a book deal with them. It's not a guarantee because it has to go through various people at Bloomsbury anyway. So, so, but thankfully, I, I did, and then it's so in June 2023.
Speaker 2:Um, I signed, I signed my book deal, but in terms of what the book is about, actually, it's very, very different to what I started writing, which is why I say everything that I wrote in 2021 has literally been scrapped, because what Bloomsbury wanted was more of a kind of an investigation. They wanted interviews, so I ended up interviewing about about 30 single childless women for the book. I ended up interviewing about 30 single childless women for the book and basically the book is essentially it's a celebration of single life. It's a celebration of being single, not having kids, but, crucially, it's not meaning to say being single, not having kids, is better than being married and having them. But but what it is to say is let's level the freaking playing field, because up until now, the world thinks that when you're single, you don't have kids, your life is less than, and that is simply wrong. It is not the case. It is a lie, it's a narrative, it's a story that needs, desperately needs to be changed, not least because you know from my own experience, but also of so many single women that I've spoken to in the last three and a half years that I've had my podcast there are many single women out there who are thriving, who are doing amazing things with their lives because they're single and they don't have kids, not in spite of it.
Speaker 2:So the book is basically divided into chapters, so so the chapters are uh, there's freedom, solitude. Uh, finances and careers, uh, sex, um, friendships, uh, solo travel. So it's kind of divided up into chapters and then, obviously, and then and then the last sort of section, I go into my real passion, which, as you know, is mindset, personal growth, all of that stuff, the fact that we have agency over our lives. So I basically talk in that final section all about the things that I did to really change my life in the way that I see my life, in the way that I see myself, so yeah, so that's what it's about. It is celebration. And for anyone out there who is single and doesn't have kids and is feeling crappy about it, there is no way that you're not going to feel better after reading this book. And if you're already happily single, it's going to really validate the life that you've chosen, because you know it really is for people on all ends of that spectrum, because you know it really is for people on all ends of that spectrum.
Speaker 2:There are lots of reasons why people are single, you know. You know I didn't choose to be single. I kind of ended up although I think I'm choosing to be, well, I am choosing to be single these days. But when I ended up single after my last relationship, I didn't sit down and think I'm going to be single. I'm choosing to be single for the rest of my life. But as the years have gone by, I've loved it more and more and more and I've loved the version of me, that is, the single version of me and the version of me without kids because this is one of the things I talk about in the book is these underrated and unacknowledged freedoms and advantages and you know possibilities that come with a life of being single or not having kids, you know yeah, well, I've got it here.
Speaker 1:Oh my god, it is really super easy to read. It's an easy read. It's um, yeah, it's bloody brilliant. Um, can we just talk about actually, the fact that you had been visualizing, oh yes, a lot of time before. Yeah, uh, you actually got the call to do that well.
Speaker 2:Well, this was, this was I'd, I'd actually, yes, so this is to do with the the us book deal with. So so I'm with bloomsbury in the uk, but hay house in the us, in canada, and bait were in the US, but it's, it will be available from tomorrow in the US and Canada, but so so, so, yes, this was a real kind of manifestation, if you like. So what happened was that before, basically before Bloomsbury reached out to me, I had been visualizing for months and months and months because I'd started writing this book, the previous one I'd been. I wanted a book deal with Hay House because they you know several of their authors, they're very interpersonal, growth and self-development stuff, so that and I just really like them, they I've read a lot of their books, a lot of their authors like Mel Robbins is with Hay House, for example, gabby Bernstein, so many people. So I had this thing about going with Hay House, for example, gabby Bernstein, so many people. So I had this thing about going with Hay House, anyway.
Speaker 2:So I would sit and visualize in my meditation this an email dropping into my inbox. I would literally visualize an email from Hay House saying you know something along the lines of you know, writing a book with Hay House or whatever, you know writing a book with Hay House or whatever, and. But then I got the deal with Bloomsbury, which of course I'm completely I'm, you know, super happy about and I'm so pleased that I did. But literally about two weeks after I signed the deal with Bloomsbury like literally about two weeks after if that I was sat working one afternoon at my laptop and an email dropped into my inbox from somebody at Hay House saying writing a book with Hay House question mark, and I I literally couldn't believe it.
Speaker 2:The long and short of it is that I ended up meeting with this woman from Hay House, amy, obviously telling her that I already had a deal with Bloomsbury, but that then what then happened was that I then ended up getting Hay House and publishing the US version of the book. But what is what is really, um, interesting? In fact, I've completely lost my train of thought. I was going to say something more on that story, but I forgot what it was, damn it. What was I going to say? What?
Speaker 1:was I saying before that I don't know about manifestation, about believing. You know it's about. You really visualize that email dropping in. You got the deal with hay house, uh, and then.
Speaker 2:I can't remember what I was gonna say. Anyway, it'll come back to me. But yeah, so that?
Speaker 1:so that is what happened with, with um, and I love that. So I love that I know, because that is such a big part of what you do, and actually the fact that it was an email that dropped in and and you may, and also that was the thing you were, I remember at the time. You're like my gosh, am I going to have to turn it down?
Speaker 2:Because I told you didn't I. I was like oh my God, you'll never guess what happened.
Speaker 1:Yes, yeah, but actually you some, you made it work, you know. That's why. That is why you've got the two different books with the two different titles, because of that which is OK, why not?
Speaker 2:Why not? Totally Pollyolly? I just remember what I was going to say, which is this it's incredible what happens when you start putting yourself out there and because and here's why the only reason I have got a book deal is because I found the courage to start a podcast, because both of those publishers reached out to me because they heard my podcast. The end, that that's it. Not because I'm special, not because I'm a great writer, nothing to do with that whatsoever. They it was purely because I put myself out of my comfort zone started a podcast, started talking about something that I cared about, started talking about something that I could talk about forever and ever. Amen, and it is. And both Hay House and Bloomsbury, the people that reached out to me, reached out because they'd heard the podcast. So all I would say is that it's unbelievable what can happen in your life when you start living in alignment with the things that actually light you up, when you start following the nudges from the universe about like, like I say, going back to the time when I was sat outside my flat, having never thought about writing a book before, and this idea came into my mind because this is how, when you're, when you're kind of in alignment and when you're you're sort of when your mind is open to possibility. And this is and this all happened, by the way because I completely shifted my mindset and the way that I felt about life and myself. So I was available to kind of receive this download about, about writing, um, so so I just think it's important to point that out, and and also one thing I'll say about this is, if anyone's listening to this or watching this, who has thought about writing a book, if I can write a freaking book, anybody can write a freaking book like if I can do it, anyone can do it and in terms of the actual process of writing it, it's such a brilliant example of why you never get clarity until you start taking action. We always wait. We just wait to do the thing until we feel ready, until we're prepared. It doesn't work like that. What happens is we have to take the first steps and then things start getting clear. When I sat down to start writing this book, I remember I had a massive, great pile. I'd done the interviews first because obviously I had to start with the interviews. I did the interviews and I printed them all out, and you can imagine this unbelievably thick pile of A4 paper. Sat there with this pile of paper going, I literally have no idea what the hell I'm doing. I have no idea how I'm going to write this book, but the reason I'm saying this is because all I did was just start. I just started, I was like, okay, well, maybe I'll just highlight the quotes from this interviewee that I might want to use. Maybe, once I've done that, maybe I'll just work out you know what quotes might fit into what chapters. And you know it literally.
Speaker 2:I just can't say enough about how we're never ready to do things that scare us, that we've never done before we get ready by taking the first action when we don't know what the hell we're doing. And when you start, you know it's that roomie quote again that I've used before it's like you know what, start walking on the way and the way appears, or whatever it is, I can't remember. But you know, once you take that first step, you, you, you understand, you know the, the next one and then you know the next one. Oh, my God, johnny, sorry, my cat's just appearing, as usual. So yeah, so yeah. Anyway, I've talked too much.
Speaker 1:And that, yeah, I mean that's it, isn't it? It literally is one step, one foot. It really is. I remember when you were doing the proposal and you were a bit like I don't even know when I'm going to do this, I haven't got any time to do this, it's just so vast, I don't. But you know, you just did it. Did you find what? Did you find work for you? Was it setting aside a certain amount of time each day? How did you find that discipline? Because I suppose it does take discipline, yeah, to get it done.
Speaker 2:It 100% takes discipline and it takes consistency 100%, but the good news is that it's not like you have to do. Oh, every day for three hours I've got to sit down and write a thousand words, it's. What is amazing is when you just set aside a small amount of time. So, for example, well, I, I used to do writing mostly first thing in the morning, so when I was writing the book, I would do some writing before I did any of my other work on the podcast or the membership or anything else. And I would. And and there were some days, by the way, where I sat there literally staring at the, at the screen, with the cursor kind of you know, flicking or what do you? Whatever you call it, whatever the word is. I would literally sit there and nothing would come. But again, that was a. That's a good example of when you feel like that if you just write something, something, some old crap, then you sort of, then more comes out. But there were, but I can't tell you how many times I sat there and just stared at the screen thinking I, literally, I, I'm not inspired, I'm, I'm not inspired, I'm, I, I don't know what I want to say I've got no idea where I'm going with this, but that's one.
Speaker 2:Actually, one of the most important things I've learned about writing a book is that you and this is so crucial so anyone who want who's thinking about doing it you cannot wait for inspiration to strike, you cannot wait to feel motivated or inspired. You have to sit down and fucking write. And even if you just even if you just end up writing a paragraph like there were many days where I would end up only writing three paragraphs, many days where I would end up only writing three paragraphs, but but it's amazing how, when you write three paragraphs, you know they built. Hang on one sec. Sorry, johnny is being complete pain. Um, they, they kind of they build up and before you know it, you've written a whole chapter. So it I think it can be. The problem is, when we think about the whole thing, it feels really overwhelming and just impossible. When you look at oh my God, I've got to write 70,000 words of a book. How am I ever going to do this? But the thing to remember is that it's incredible how just a little bit of consistency and discipline every day, or five days a week, or four days a week, how much that builds up over the space of a year.
Speaker 2:I mean to put it in context I signed the deal in June 2023 and I, the book came out in June 2025 and I, and and Bloomsbury reached out to me in August 2022. It was a nearly three year process from start to finish. But yeah, and that and that does seem daunting. But of course, with hindsight I look back now and I'm like, oh my God, I can't believe it's out. I can't believe it's out already. It's gone so quickly. But then it's easy to say that now with hindsight. At the time it felt like a real, a really big deal.
Speaker 2:But but I just for anyone, because you know, apparently lots of people aspire to write a book.
Speaker 2:I wasn't one of them, but apparently quite a large percentage of, like the population has a bit.
Speaker 2:You know what is thought about or wanted to write a book and all I would say is, for God's sake, if that's, you just fucking do it and you just you just have to set that time aside just three or four times a week just to write a paragraph or a page, whatever it is, and also to remember that you know, the first draft is always a load of crap.
Speaker 2:I mean, like my first draft of the manuscript was massively changed, massively, and again, that's the thing you can actually, as you're writing, you don't have to be thinking, oh my god, this has to be perfect, this is what's actually going to be in the book. It's just getting it going and getting something down, and then you can start shaping and refining it as you go through the editing process. But it really breaking it down into tiny little chunks is is the key to doing this, because when you think about it as a whole of like, oh my god, it's going to take me two years or two and a half years, then it feels too overwhelming. But the time this is another one of my favorite phrases, which is the time is going to pass anyway. So so are you going to spend the next two years thinking about writing a book if that's what you, if it's something you want to do, or are you going to do 15 minutes of writing five days a week and in two years time, you'll have a fucking book, you know, yeah absolutely.
Speaker 1:I'm interested how do you stay when there's so many changes happening all the time from your editor?
Speaker 2:oh, my god, editing is a nightmare. How do?
Speaker 1:you stay true, though, to your own voice in that process um, I don't, I don't know how to answer that.
Speaker 2:I mean, it's like the the editing process is really that that was the hardest part of the whole thing. So so, for example, holly, my editor, when she'd sort of because the way, the way that we did it, we started off that I would send her a chapter at a time, she would basically read it through go, yes, you're on the right lines. And then, once I'd finished, or no, you're not. And then, once I'd finished, the manuscript. She then went through the whole thing. And it's the scariest days when you get the whole book back covered in red, covered in red when you get the whole book back covered in red.
Speaker 2:Covered in red, oh god, it's like go back to school, literally. I swear to god, that is the heart, that is the hardest work of all. Is that first, proper edit when you are and, and, but in terms of train. Saying true to myself, it wasn't that I was being asked to write anything that I well, there are a few things that I was asked to write that I wouldn't necessarily have chosen to write myself, but it's mainly just shaping what I'd already written, and it was mainly things like reorganizing chapters. So it or it might be like you need to write a bit more about that or there's too much about that. There's quite a lot of cutting. You have to be really quite ruthless. You have to, like I had to take chunks out that I really liked, um, writing extra bits in. So I don't know if this answers the question, but I never felt like apart apart from a couple of things that I, for example, I didn't really want to do a chapter on finances, right, because it's just not something I wanted. I just didn't want to do a chapter about money because, you know, it's just not where my heart goes, it's just not what I'm, you know, but they, they. You know Bloomsbury sort of insisted there needed to be and, well, you know, fair enough. And now I'm.
Speaker 2:I'm really glad that I did a chapter about finances and careers, careers and financial independence. It's called um, but but. But the vast majority of it was was um, yeah, I was. I was very much able to stay true to what I wanted to say. But also because I tell you what the hardest or one of the hardest things about writing this particular book was weaving in other people's words. That was really bloody hard, the bits. Because you'll notice, in the book, like pretty much in every chapter, there's like my kind of spiel where I sort of, you know, do like an intro and I'm kind of that's just my writing and then I'll kind of bring, bring other people in, sort of thing, and and that that was really hard. It was really difficult to weave other people's experiences into my narrative.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, I mean for sure, that first big edit was just that. That was when I felt like I was back at school. Oh my God. And again, you just get this whole document back just covered in red marks and it takes, you know, I mean that that is like whoa, that is, that is full-on, not gonna lie. But again, even with that, you just have to take it one day at a time, take it one hour at a time, just do it and you know they give you. You have a certain number of weeks to kind of turn. So there were like two or three edits that we did and you have a certain amount of time to turn each one around and kind of get it back to to to your editor.
Speaker 1:Um, I didn't answer your question, polly, sorry, yeah yeah, no, no, you, you kind of did, you, did, you did. I mean what?
Speaker 1:yeah, I mean, ultimately you're, the book is in your voice, but I was just wondering when you do get all of those edits and you have to make them and how that, how, how that then feels. What do you hope, lucy, for someone who reads this book or listens to this book because you also did the audio, which must have been really good fun. That was my favorite thing ever. I loved it do you hope someone is going to take from it, if they, if they buy the book or if they listen to it?
Speaker 2:I really just hope that anyone who reads this book is essentially just going to a feel better about being single. B feel more empowered and hopeful about their single lives, and three just start to understand that it is possible to have just as good of a life when you're single. You don't have kids. Can you hear that drilling? We should wrap it up, shouldn't we? Sorry guys, there's major drilling coming from the garden.
Speaker 1:Um well, so where can people go and get? Where can people go and get it lucy?
Speaker 2:so you can buy the book on amazon. It's called shiny happy singles in the uk. So if you're in the book on Amazon, it's called Shiny Happy Singles in the UK. So if you're in the UK, just type that into Google and you can buy it on Amazon. Or you can go to my website, lucymagasoncom forward slash book. And if you're in the US or Canada, it's called Thrive Solo and again you can buy it on Amazon. You can get it on Audible. You can get it on Kindle, yeah, but if you go to my website, lucimogasoncom forward slash book, then there are lots of. I've put links for all the different places, like Waterstones, if you're in the UK, or Indigo, if you're in the US, and you know bookshop and all of these different places. So that's probably the best thing to do, or just go straight to Amazon and type the title in. But, um, sorry about that, drilling that completely.
Speaker 1:Um, well listen honestly.
Speaker 2:So many congratulations, it's such an achievement well done everyone should go and get the book yes, please, and even people who aren't single, by the way, because one thing this book does do and I'm hoping that some people will read it who aren't single because what it will do is it will open up the eyes of the world, I think, in terms of how people view single women without kids, and I think that's really important. So I personally want people who are who who aren't single, to read it too, because I think it's it's just time that we started normalizing solo life. It's just time that we started normalizing solo life and and and and make. You know, it's time that we started to see it as completely equal to its couple counterparts, because it is. You know.
Speaker 2:It's again, it's no better, it's no worse. It's just a different life and whatever life you live, whatever life you live, there's going to be good bits and bad bits. Whether you're married with kids or you're single without them, there are going to be. There are equal amounts of good and bad, because this is just life and actually it's not about your relationship status, as you and I know. It's very much more about what's going on in your head and you know your mindset.
Speaker 1:Really, and the relationship you have with yourself.
Speaker 2:Exactly. Thanks, Polly, for letting me ramble on about the book.
Speaker 1:Thank you, thank you Well, exactly, thanks polly, for letting me ramble on about the book.
Speaker 2:Thank you, thank you well listen, there we go, we're done, thanks. Um, yeah, we're back on thursday, aren't we? Are we back on?
Speaker 1:that, yes, we're back on thursday because we need to decide on a topic.
Speaker 2:Yes, perfect.
Speaker 1:All right, love. All right. I'll speak to you later. Lots of love bye, thank you.